NO ZOO.

My daughter is two years old. Like most kids of that age, she loves all kinds of animals. So a donkey is as cute for her as a dog. Grown ups in cities prefer dogs to donkeys, for their loyalty I'm told. But i have heard that Donkeys are no less loyal. But in a city like Mumbai, i can understand that space issues come in the way of animal-lovers refusing to keep "German Shepherd Donkeys."

We don't have a Pet. So for the time being, I behave like an "all-in-one-animal", make crazy noises, and entertain/terrify my family. When I have more disposable "love" to offer, and a personal Hut in the hills, I will think of getting a donkey or a rabbit. I have nothing against dogs, you see, it's just that they have it a bit too easy in the adoption market. In certain ways, they are like the Brahmins in the animal community now!

Anyway, the point of the blog was my visit to the Byculla Zoo today with my daughter(Amelie) and wife. I have been a bit nervous about this visit right from the time the idea was mooted last night:  "How about taking Amelie to the Zoo and showing her Monkeys and Deers?". The idea was very noble you see, but I was never a "Zoo" kinda person. If Therapists were as fashionable in India as in the West, I would have surely worked on it and got it cured, i guess.

You see, I have worked in 25-30 companies between the restless age of 23 and 29. Whenever I see these animals behind the cage, my memory flashes back to those days of hard labor between 9am and 5pm. The effort involved in getting the clock to move faster sitting inside those small cubicles/cages -it all comes back now like a bad dream. Freedom is something I fought for, and now that I am a free man(PS: I charge for my freelance work), i can't hold the eye contact of any animal inside the cage for long. 

If they could understand my language, i would have asked these animals as to how they got themselves into this messy cage. What do they do when they feel lonely? Have they heard about Facebook or were they captured before that era? I also wanted to ask the Hippo whether he knew his community was called Hippo by us Humans? Also what do they call us. Hopefully not Chappoos! But Byculla Zoo didn't feel like the place for this question-answer. This was a zoo designed to be boring. Bored looking animals inside the cage. Bored looking families, outside the cage, looking as if they were inside the cage.

The last time I have been to a Zoo was the majestic Trivandrum Zoo. Huge area with lots of animals. At least the cages were bigger there. But bigger or smaller, a cage is a cage.  Byculla Zoo didn't have many animals. Either they were not there because it was a Sunday and had gone to their respective villages, or they have been sold to the Circus. We saw 4 Elephants, 20 deers, 2 Hippos, 2 Bears, a few Birds, a few Monkeys, few crows too. You get to see more animals in Mumbai roads than these I feel. The area was green for sure post the rains, but I could smell sadness in the air. I read somewhere that humans are the only animals who know how to smile. So we look at the animals in the cage and smile at them, wanting them to smile back at us. But the lonely Bear inside the cage looked at me for a second, shrugged and went back to dreaming about his time in the jungle years back, before he was caught by the evil version of Shikari Shambu. 

I wonder whether Zoo Officials can use this space for something more innovative.

Since humans are(were) also animals, what if certain kinds of animal-humans are also kept inside these cages. Imagine a bullet-proof glass cage with Kasab inside it. He is an animal too, right? How many of us have seen in flesh how a Terrorist looks like? Imagine another cage with Abu Salem, Telgi etc. What would be more of a Punishment for these high profile criminals than people staring at them from morning till evening. Charge more money at the ticket counter. Why should tax-payers money be spend protecting these criminals in secluded dark jails. Make some money out of this spectacle and treat the real animals better in these Zoos, or better, set them free.

This is my last visit to a Zoo(unless I have to shoot a Zoo scene!). I think probably visiting a National Park is a better idea. Or National Geographic Channel is not bad. They have gone High Definition( life-like) these days:). Hopefully Amelie will grow up having better ideas.

Right now I am thinking of those poor animals in the cage and what would they be doing at this time. They are not criminals to be put behind bars. Hope Inspector Dhoble, the Protector of the Oppressed barges in unannounced in his mufti, rescues them and sets them free. Or a more dramatic 'Shawshank Redemption-like' daring escape led by Mastermind Monkey. Better still would be a combination of these two - the animals making a daring escape taking Dhoble along to the Jungle. That would make Mumbai a very free place finally.

Ok, now I feel better. Come on Mastermind Monkey, dig your way out of that silly cage. You guys deserve a better life.